Where do I go from here?

Why am I always attracted to the people nobody else wants?

I think maybe it's one of my character flaws that has to do with past self-esteem issues. That if I feel I can "rescue" someone then I feel needed, and when I'm needed I feel whole.

The guys I've liked (not necessarily dated) don't all have the same body type. There has been very thin to very fat and everything in between. There has been short, tall, and average heights. Full thick hair to thin balding hair. There's been a professional magician, two professional clowns, a chef, a car salesman, and several "computer nerds", among others.

I can't seem to find the connecting thread, other than the fact that each of them had some aspect in their lives that either hampered them socially, or frightened them to talk about.

Am I a rescuer? Maybe this is the reason I haven't had a healthy male/female relationship ever. At least what I'd call healthy - strong enough to weather the bumps in Life's Road.

Heck I don't know. I've always believed that any two consenting adults could make a life together, if committed to doing so. I still believe that, in theory, though I don't have any real-life examples of that to follow.

Don't know where I'm going with this. I'm conflicted. Caught between wanting someone in my life, and wanting my life to be smooth and easy. Not breaking the rhythm. And, not getting my heart broken by wanting more than is being offered.